Connect to Rise: How Nervous System and Body Awareness can be the Key to Real Change

By Chelsey Gilbert LMT, Host of Transformative Talks and Owner of Transformative Wellness ***if you want to check out the presentation this blog is based on, watch inside the Empowered Healing Community.

Have you ever received a stressful email and immediately felt your shoulders tighten? Maybe your heart began racing during a difficult conversation, or you felt completely exhausted after spending the day pushing through an overwhelming situation. These reactions are not random, and they are not signs that your body is working against you. They are part of your nervous system’s natural attempt to protect you.

Learning how your nervous system functions can help you recognize these signals sooner and respond with greater awareness. When you understand what is happening inside your body, you can begin using simple practices to support yourself before stress builds into complete overwhelm.

This does not mean eliminating every difficult emotion or remaining calm all the time. Nervous system regulation is not about forcing yourself to feel peaceful when you are angry, anxious, grieving, or afraid. It is about building your capacity to experience stress, move through it, and eventually return to a more balanced state.

What Is the Autonomic Nervous System?

Your autonomic nervous system is the part of your nervous system that manages many of the processes happening automatically in the background. It helps regulate your heart rate, breathing, digestion, blood pressure, temperature, and other functions you do not have to consciously control.

You do not need to remind your heart to beat or tell your digestive system how to process a meal. Your autonomic nervous system is constantly gathering information, internally and eternally, then adjusting your internal state based on what it perceives. You can think of it as your own personal internal security system.

It is always asking questions such as:

“Am I safe right now?”

“Is there something I need to respond to?”

“Do I have enough support to relax?”

“Do I need to prepare to protect myself?”

This system responds to obvious danger, but it can also react to more subtle stressors. A deadline, conflict with someone you love, financial pressure, a loud environment, an unexpected phone call, or even a memory can create a response in the body. Many of these reactions happen before the thinking part of the brain has time to fully understand the situation. Your subconscious cannot differentiate between the kinds of threats or stressors you are encountering. You may consciously know that an email from your boss is not a physical threat, but your body can still respond with a racing heart, tense muscles, shallow breathing, or a feeling of panic.

The Sympathetic Nervous System: Your Body’s Accelerator

The sympathetic nervous system is commonly associated with the fight-or-flight response. I like to think of it as the body’s accelerator, or the "ON" switch. When your system senses a potential threat or challenge, it gives you the energy needed to respond.

Your heart may beat faster, your breathing may become quicker or shallower, and your muscles may tighten. You might feel restless, irritable, anxious, hyperfocused, or ready to act. Some people become more reactive, while others move into autopilot and have difficulty thinking clearly.

This activation is not inherently bad. We need it when we are responding to an emergency, meeting a deadline, exercising, or taking action in a challenging moment. The sympathetic nervous system is designed to help us survive and mobilize energy when we need it.

The difficulty comes when the body stays activated long after the stressful experience has ended or when everyday situations repeatedly trigger the same intense response. For example, if you had dead line at work and felt yourself switch into go mode, accomplished the task but are still ruminating about it days later and it keeps you up at night, your accelerator may be stuck.

You might resolve whatever issue logically, but your body may continue replaying it. Your jaw remains clenched. Your shoulders stay lifted. Your breathing remains restricted. You lie in bed thinking about what happened, and your body responds as though the experience is still unfolding. Overtime, this can lead to other chronic issues.

The Parasympathetic Nervous System: Your Body’s Brake

The parasympathetic nervous system is often described as the “rest-and-digest” side of the autonomic nervous system. If the sympathetic system is the accelerator, the parasympathetic system acts more like the brake or the "OFF" switch.

When your body senses enough safety to slow down, it can direct more energy toward digestion, restoration, recovery, and other processes that are not prioritized during an immediate threat.

In this state, your breathing may become slower and deeper. Your muscles can begin to soften. Your thoughts may feel clearer, and you may find it easier to connect with other people, make decisions, eat, rest, or be present in what you are doing. It's that big sigh of relief after a stressful situation or that wave of calm that comes over you at the end of a long day.

The goal is not to remain in this state every second of the day. A healthy nervous system needs to move between activation and rest. Regulation is the ability to shift between these states appropriately and recover after something stressful happens. Simply put, regulation does not mean that nothing ever bothers you. It means that your body can become activated when necessary without remaining trapped there.

What Can Nervous System Activation Feel Like?

Activation or dysregulation can look different for everyone. Some people feel constantly anxious, restless, or on edge. Others feel disconnected, exhausted, numb, or unable to get moving. You may alternate between these experiences depending on what is happening in your life.

Some common signs may include persistent muscle tension, shallow breathing, difficulty sleeping, irritability, trouble concentrating, digestive discomfort, emotional overwhelm, fatigue, or feeling unable to settle even when you finally have an opportunity to rest. Take a moment to note if you experience these on a regular basis.

It can also appear as overworking, staying constantly busy, or feeling uncomfortable when things become quiet. On the other end of the spectrum, you might withdraw from others, procrastinate, shut down, or feel as though you are simply going through the motions. These experiences can have many possible causes, so it is important not to assume that every symptom is related to stress or the nervous system. New, persistent, or concerning symptoms should always be discussed with an appropriate healthcare professional. Now take a moment to see if you can identify the times when you struggle to come out of these states, just as an awareness exercise. Nervous system awareness is a helpful piece of the puzzle and often the key to creating change, but it is not a replacement for medical or mental health care.

Your Body Is Trying to Protect You

When your nervous system becomes activated, it can be easy to feel frustrated with yourself. You may wonder why you cannot simply calm down, stop overthinking, or let something go. If you feel like your brain and body are being hijacked by some of these indicators without any logical reason why, that could be a sign that you are actively in fight or flight mode.

But your body is not trying to make your life more difficult. It is responding to what it believes may be a threat. Sometimes I compare this to a fire alarm. If there is a real fire, you want the alarm to sound. The alarm becomes a problem when it continues blaring after the danger has passed—or when it goes off because you slightly burned a piece of toast. The solution is not to shame the alarm for being too sensitive. It is to recognize what is happening, check for actual danger, and help the system understand when the environment is safe again. You can use these moments as an opportunity to feel some gratitude for your brain trying to keep you safe, but sometimes we need to gently let it know that we don't need the help right now.

Body Awareness Is the First Step

You cannot respond to a signal you do not recognize. This is why body awareness is such an important part of nervous system regulation. Body awareness simply means noticing the sensations within your body and becoming curious about what may be contributing to them. You might observe that your shoulders tense whenever you check your email, your breathing changes around a particular person, or your stomach begins hurting during stressful conversations.

A body check-in does not need to be complicated. Pause for a moment and ask yourself:

“What sensations do I notice right now?”

“Where am I holding tension?”

“How is my breathing?”

“Do I feel present in my body or disconnected from it?”

“What might my body need in this moment?”

The goal is not to analyze every sensation or immediately make it disappear. Begin by noticing. That awareness gives you more information and creates an opportunity to choose how you want to respond. Keeping track with a journal may also help you identify patterns and triggers you may not have been aware of.

Simple Practices to Support Regulation

You do not need an hour-long routine, expensive equipment, or the perfect environment to connect with your nervous system. Small, repeated moments of support can be incredibly valuable.

Try Box Breathing

Box breathing gives your mind something simple to follow while bringing your attention back to your body. Gently inhale for a count of four, hold for four, exhale for four, and pause for four before beginning again. You can repeat this cycle a few times without forcing your breath. If holding your breath feels uncomfortable or increases anxiety, skip the pauses and simply allow your exhale to become slow and easy.

Use a Longer, Softer Exhale

When you feel activated, try inhaling gently through your nose and exhaling slowly through your mouth. Imagine that you are releasing some of the pressure with each breath.

The purpose is not to take the biggest breath possible. Sometimes forcing a very deep breath can create more tension. Allow the breath to remain comfortable and focus on making the exhale a little slower.

Let Your Body Move

Stress prepares the body for action, so movement can provide that activation with somewhere to go. You might shake out your hands, roll your shoulders, stretch, walk, sway, or dance to a song that makes you feel good. The movement does not need to look a certain way. Pay attention to what your body naturally wants to do. Even thirty seconds of intentional movement may help interrupt the feeling of being frozen or stuck.

Visualize a Place of Safety or Ease

Think of a place, memory, person, or experience that helps you feel peaceful, supported, or connected. It could be a favorite vacation spot, time spent in nature, a comforting room, or a meaningful moment with someone you love. Rather than only picturing the scene, notice how it feels. What colors are present? What can you hear? What sensations arise in your body? Try to connect with the emotions it brings up. You can also place a hand over your heart, abdomen, or another area that feels comforting as you connect with the memory.

Find One Place That Feels Okay

When you are uncomfortable, your attention naturally moves toward the loudest sensation. If your back hurts, it can feel as though your entire body is in pain. Try gently connecting with one area in your body that feels neutral, comfortable, or even slightly less tense. Maybe your hands feel warm, your feet feel supported by the floor, or your forehead feels relaxed. Spend a few moments noticing that area without trying to change anything else. This does not deny the discomfort. It simply reminds your nervous system that pain or tension is not the only information available.

Ground Yourself Through Your Senses

Grounding does not require walking barefoot outside, although connecting with the earth can be a wonderful grounding practice. You can also ground yourself by intentionally noticing your present environment. Feel your feet against the floor or your body supported by the chair. Look around and name a few things you can see. Notice the temperature of the air, the sounds around you, or the texture of something in your hands. These sensory details can help remind your body that you are here, in this moment, rather than inside a past experience or future worry.

Regulation Is a Practice, Not a Performance

You may try one of these practices and feel a noticeable shift. Other times, nothing dramatic will happen. That does not mean you did it incorrectly. Your nervous system has been learning from your experiences for your entire life. Supporting it is usually not about finding one magical technique that immediately makes every difficult feeling disappear. It is about consistently creating small experiences of awareness, safety, choice, and connection.

It is also important to remember that different practices work for different people. Breathwork may feel calming for one person and uncomfortable for another. Someone else may respond better to movement, music, pressure, visualization, time outside, or connection with a trusted person.

Listen to your body. If a practice increases distress, stop and choose something gentler. If you frequently feel overwhelmed, panicked, disconnected, or unable to return to a comfortable state, consider seeking support from a trauma-informed mental health professional, somatic practitioner or qualified healthcare provider.

Connection Creates Choice

Your nervous system is communicating with you all day long. The more familiar you become with its signals, the sooner you can recognize when you are moving toward overwhelm and offer yourself support.

You may not be able to control every stressful event that happens. You can, however, learn to notice your reactions with more compassion. You can pause, breathe, move, ground, and ask what your body needs before automatically pushing through. Connecting with yourself is not just another task to add to your wellness routine. It is a way of reclaiming choice. When you can feel what is happening within you, you are better able to respond intentionally—and that is where meaningful change begins.

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